When battles needed to be fought, and adults needed to be baby-ed, the child missed out heavily. On growing, learning, and understanding life. On knowing who and what was acceptable, and who and what was dangerous.
A child abused or neglected missed out. By all means. On parts that were integral for his wholesome growth and holistic development. When childhood was about keeping the peace and setting up defences, there was a part of the child that never got to come out and be. Just to be. Instead, it was only shut down until childhood was no more.
Until such adults who lived such lives as children come to terms with this, these parts would remain underdeveloped, or at the very least, deeply conflicted. He needs to sit down and decipher which parts were missed and give himself the opportunity now, as an adult, to experience them. To feel them in his core and enjoy them. To learn and listen to the learned. To give himself the chance and the time and to facilitate the making of an identity. To let go beautifully, of those who hurt him and look forward to carving out a better, kinder world for himself.
Leave a Reply